I was chasing for someone love than I was lost in game.

One upon the time, there was me and a guy. A guy who I could lose myself for him even my life. And also had another guy who always there when I need help. Let back to reality, when you heard a word “ love “ what was the most meaningful come cross to your mind? To me that was the a beautiful cloudy day which is became to bad storm with sec. The beautiful didn’t last, you are the one who was been in love one side while he wasn’t. I don’t know what zone we have been through but sometimes we looks like a couple and the other we became a sibling and not too long we became a stranger. It hard to blame on me while he was made me confusing all the time. The way he was taking care the way he treated me those actions ghosting me every night. I tried to talk to him about our relationship, he just pushed me away stopped not to talk. Before I have the feeling for him I have asked him many time about his personal life I mean doesn’t he dating someone yet, the answer I got he is single who not having much time to thing about loving stuff. I trust those with and I could not find anything about his love life on social media also. We talked we laughed we chitchat, hanged out, eating out but we never called that was dating. Even we went on the trip together just 2 of us. I was thinking about does man always doing those stuff with a girl he not even like a bit!?! Does he like me?!? If not why he took me here while these are couple usually did. I was talking to myself everyday thinking all about his attitude. And now I realized I have been used, I still have no idea that he was dating someone or not but I just no that he just using me to comfort his loneliness life. Honestly I knew that he was being nice to everyone he known, but there are some point made me think he like me by the ways treated me differently from other.

Feeling bottled up?

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A long lost friend

HEYY, It’s been a long long time since we talked. I’ve tried to reach out to you about a few years ago but I’ve never been heard from you ever since. We have lost touch completely. I always miss you. I know that you’ve dealt with mental issues but I have no ideas how are you doing now. I have been dreaming about you a lot in these last few years and last night you popped up in my dream again and it felt so real that we were reunited. You’re still matters to me even though I have never been heard from you since I texted you few years ago. I just wanna know how have you been, how is your life. You’re no longer active on your social media and I have no idea if this post is gonna reach you but if so, I hope you know that I miss you. I know you must be doing well for yourself; but whatever it is you are doing, I hope you’re happy. Either of us are chooses our paths in life, and I guess your path just no longer intertwined with mine. But I hope you’re happy. Because I really do wish you the best. And I genuinely wish you well. It’s completely fine if you don’t want to reach out to me again. If it’s possible, please let me know that you’re alright and that’s what I want to hear from you. From someone who remembers and will always remember you.

លើសពីមិត្ត

បានត្រឹមតែជាមិត្តភក្តិ រយៈពេល៦ឆ្នាំ

Empty Bin

I think I’ve built a very convenient Persona for myself to get by this world. Everywhere I go, Every group of people, or everyone that I met, I know what they see me but not in me, they find I’m a very polite, friendly, good manner person. I know this, because that is all my persona shows them. But their instincts would tell them to be care to approach me with their good intentions, maybe it’s a friendship or love. Their instincts would tell them, I’m not just they see, there are something more beneath that. And it’s right, I’m hiding myself under this forged amour because I can’t be who I actually want to be. How I was treat from a very young age had traumatized me to be myself. I’ve lived my life forged with lies that I tell myself, that now it makes me terrified to unfold the truth. Now at the end of everyday, I feel so empty, like an empty void that can’t never be filled. I named this “empty bin”, because that’s just how I am, loud but empty. I’m tired of this life. Even though I know life is pain and suffering, but how I still couldn’t get used to if? And it’s even more tragic if you live a life with full of self-deception. lately, all I could think of is, how to die and leave no pain to everyone around me. “How should this empty bin should leave?…”

You

''I got my hopes up.'' He whispered. ''About what?'' She asked. ''About you actually loving me back." ''I tried to show you I loved you and you wouldn’t let me which is fine.'' ''But you know the worst feeling is when you find out you didn't mean as much to someone as you thought you did and you look so stupid for caring too much." "I'm sorry.'' She said.

Inside

There a big black hole inside of me which can't be fill. That empty part even myself can't complete it. U think having everything are happinese? No! I have and able to get what i want but if u ask am i happy yet? No i don't, Do i ask for more? Also, no i don't. I don't understand either why am i like this? I think everything seem to be enough for me but why am i feeling so empty? Why is it so dry?...... How long does this feeling going to last?.... I want to feel happinese too...

The final date of us

My girlfriend and I had been dating for more than a year, and we shared a close friendship beyond anything else. We always understood each other and had a deep love that remained strong through all the ups and downs. However, our relationship came to a halt eventually as we realized that we were in different places in our lives. While she was only 20 and looking forward to getting married and having children soon, I was 21 and had different priorities in mind. I wanted to spend more time dating her, and I was thinking about starting a family around the age of 30. It was a tough decision, but we both knew that it was for the best if we went our separate ways. On the last day of our relationship, we decided to have one last date night. I took her out to a romantic restaurant that had live music and bought her flowers that she loved. We reminisced about our favorite moments together and talked about all the things that we would miss about each other. We discussed how we had impacted each other's lives in so many positive ways. Later in the evening, we went to see the Hobbit, which was one of our favorite movies. It was a bittersweet experience to watch the film together knowing that it would be our last time doing so. We hugged and kissed for one last time as we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways. Although it was an incredibly tough decision to make, we both agreed that it was the right one. It was the perfect end to our relationship, and it allowed us to move on with our lives. While we went our separate ways, I will always cherish the memories that we created together.

I hope you're happier now.

It seems to me like you couldn't wait to finally getting rid of me...I was hoping you'd ask me to stay after all the shits we've been through and after all these months I've spent suffering in silent but you didn't mind losing me at all You would rather start afresh with someone new than to make things right between us I really did believe you when you gave me your word Never once did I question you and your intentions...I thought I knew you by heart and you wouldn't do anything to hurt me...I defended you to everyone Now I'm left feeling like I'm constantly dying

Should we consider about the past?

My bf… I need you guys advice… Everyone around me been telling me that he a walking a-red flag… what he did in the past… hurt many girl cheat on many girls… flirt with many girls… however currently, he been treating me really good.. like literally everyone in his school knew him about what he did in the past.. i’m sorry i’m so stress i’m rambling around… i need your advice