Too sensitive and weak

I hate how I'm too soft and emotionally weak. I cry over things that normal people would just brush off and move on. Little things can make me feel down and once I'm down, I don't really know how to pick myself up. When I see something that hurts my feelings, I would think about it for several months. I've been spending way too long trying to move on from someone I've only known for a short period of time and doesn't even care about me. If the person happens to know about my feelings, they probably find me stupid and pathetic. It's also difficult for me to share these things with my friends because they would find me overly emotional because even I myself think so. But I just can't help it. Is there even a way to improve myself to be mentally strong like others? Cos I really admire those who can just brush things off and let go of things easily. I can't keep on being this way when I've entered adulthood for quite a few years already.

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

I don't know should I move on or still waiting for him?

I saw you usually react and read all of the confess in this page so, I hope you see this. I've been waiting for you for a long time without getting any messages from you. What do you think about me? Do you want me to waiting for you or want me to move on? Please let me know dear. I'm stuck. I want you to know that I love, I don't want to lose you. I can waiting for you if you ask me to wait.. but if you want me to move on, That's okay I can accept it. ☺️
2025-08-14

Hi

How are you?
2025-08-14

Irreplaceable you.

You were the best, you were the one who i trully “Love”. The word ‘Love’ is a strong word for both of us to use. We cross path as if fate brought us together for a reason. We clicked so well, it feels like 2 broken pieces were placed to complete each other missing parts. We both have the same taste in Movies, Music, things that revolve around us, We like to spend quality time together. It gets to the point where the word ‘Love’ grows on me and It gets to the point where i can’t go on a day without talking to you. You are just as cold as the winter, independent as you are and i love you. It’s hard for you to show your feelings toward others, you said it’s lame to ask for affections. but we eventually part ways. Months have passed, I started to live without you, I couldn’t move on from you if gets to the point where i have to date someone to move on from you, for godsake i couldn’t you were there everywhere i go, on my mind like a lyric that stucked in my head and i kept repeating it over and over. Everywhere i go i see familiar faces, where they looked like you, same glasses, same length of hair, the same hair style, the same way u walk, everything just reminding me of you. I was a fool to let you go, everything leads to regret, i should have never left you in the first place, i should have changed for you. You loved me, you moved on. I’m happy for you. We both crossed path and i’m glad. Our time that we’ve spent it will shine like gold in my memories. Irreplaceable you, no one can take your place.

2025-08-14

To strong

I heard people said "when u are a girl and u're strong is hard for a man to catch u up. Because when u sad or depress and in a hard situation u never need ur man to comfort u cause u can deal it on ur own. That will make up think u are strong enough to deal with ur proplem and he is too useless and starting to distance himself from u cause he think u are to high like a star for him to catch and he to weak, not a man who u deserve". I think they are right. I had been in 3relatio ahips now. The reason of my break up are I am to strong and i never show my weakness and even not talk about my things to my man, so they broke up with me. They never knew i am living a misirible life. I had all kind of pain and trying really hard each day until everything become a habbit. The pain can hurt me anymore.
2025-08-14

Have you ever missed me once ?

From someone you didn’t talk to anymore. It’s been almost 3 years since we met each other in China . Everything went smoothly for us until we got back to our home country. You started to change all of your attitude toward me, the text became emotionless as cold ice. Anything reminds me of you even your favorite drink, favorite dessert, favorite food and all the things we used to do together. Have you ever thought about how we spend there ? How we talked? How we explore the Chinese food ? How I walked you to your school gate ? Have you ever missed me even once? Did anything remind me of you? #KNT01.

2025-08-14

Farewell..

Hey it's been almost two months since we broke up, I still remembered you left me on 4th Sep with a short meaningless message "I want to be alone" without any explaination without a closure you just left me there in the dark wondering what did i do wrong but now that you seems happier i guess i was the problem. I wonder what went wrong i wonder if we give up too early or if i held on for too long? I never thought goodbye would be so hard. I'm writing this because i'm going to let go of us of you..life been awfully hard on me these days. My family my work nothing really works out for me i miss venting out to you about my problems yes i miss you i still do but its not that i want us back i'm glad that you are doing well on your own. it's sad because what i felt for you was really special and now i have to let go of everything as much as i hate giving up but i have to this time because i can't keep torturing myself like that, I stayed up all night crying i woke up in the morning crying i barely even touch food i didn't even go out and meet my friend all i did was getting drunk every nights so i can fall asleep,i keep doing things that i don't enjoy doing like active on the social media adding story publicly so you could see you know me better than anyone i aint the type to do that i ususally really private about my life it's getting tiring..this getting too long i'm gonna make it short..Take care T, you're a good person thanks you for the time we spent together, the calls the texts the late night conversations. i hope that you're happy with the way your life is right now i wish only the best for you ..Goodbye.
2025-08-14

Slave of love

I am the owner of #KJ0002. Time sure flies, we no longer text even though he knew I always wait for his texts and notifications. Even after he unblock me, he is not following back my ig and is no longer a friend in FB as well. But whenever I miss him and I post a story, he was always my first viewer to view it. Not until he decided to post another video @ his TikTok which is a very scary place that everything started between us. My tears just fall like an idiot with the little hope "Do I ever cross your mind when you see that video of yours"? It just hits me so hard because every movement everything that happens is still fresh in my mind, his voice still echoing in my ears, his smell still sticking to my nose, his kiss still warming my lips, our adultery stuff which I gave him out of my pure love for him still crawling back to my brain and it's torturing my every breathes. He is living his best life right now, while I am suffering from tears every single second because of him. Fools will eventually die from its stupidity? He once promised me to not let my tears drop because of him, one of my best friends also reminded me about the red flags since day 1 but I refuse to do so and mess with him. Up until this moment, the very first time that he's not viewing my story yet asking him whether Do I cross his mind or not at least once when he posts that place which has taken a huge place in my heart. I even get more clowning myself by commenting on that TikTok's video of him "what a nice view" and he just replied immediately, I think I knew now maybe my ig dm with him finally went rock bottom since he's stick to his phone 24/7. I am now waiting for him on my birthday which we suppose to meet again but somehow I made him mad at me and I don't know what is going to happen on my birthday, whether he shows up or not? I am still waiting, Little does he know my tears are now competing to drop without any hesitation. I am dying from time to time, I am living to his "air promises" I look back at our chat in the good old days that he told me to stick to 3 meals a day, stay hydrated, stay positive, and stay calm. I really want to turn back time to that night the 2nd sleepover with him. I left many unspoken words that I want to say in front of him. Seems like now I have no longer chance to meet him now. I can say now I have officially become a slave of him for him. I no longer can control my emotion as well as my body which I gave him all without anything left. He feels like home to me, now that he is gone? What can I do? I can only pray to god, trying my best to wait for him which is impossible but it is out of my control that's the only thing I could do to calm my mind. What should I do right now? The more I try to erase every moment I have with him, the more it is haunting me. How many tears must I shed, how many times must I cry? How many tears must I use for him to take pity on me? I am fighting my worst battle with myself right now. I told myself to be happy because my birthday is coming up in just a week. I have never broken someone's heart since I was born, why now am getting this treatment from someone I loved wholeheartedly? I felt bad for 3 people that I kept repeating find good points in him and kept on venting to them about the same cycle. Thanks to them that at least they listen to my whole story which I still can't forgive myself for the mess I created. I hope I can smile for my birthday this year, I am getting old but seems like I'm still childish when it's come to him. I am still hoping he remembers that this birthday boy is in a week, even it is not impossible but I am still waiting for the impossible to happen. Sorry for my broken English.

2025-08-14

Is it important that I worth something?

hey there, life has been so much going on right now. The life itself is going downhill to the hell or maybe I misinterpret that. I have been feeling lonely and unimportant after some hardships, breakup, lots of work, study and many more when they all come to my face at the same time. Probably I am stressed out or burnout that makes me feel like that way. Nevertheless, I feel like I am such a useless person, where everyone starts to blame me for everything even the little mistakes I made. I feel so little and just wanna go away from it. Saying those words make me such a self pity person. As day by day, i feel myself just like a smaller and smaller person and feel like s**t somehow. People say you gotta love yourself and have fun all by yourself, but when it comes to everything not going well as expected and everyone starts blaming me for little things, I just…. any advices?