Crying Every night

Let me tell you about my nightmares. The most things I am Afraid of , it is I am gonna lose my man once day. It hurt so much. The man I love the most more than myself. But we still can’t be together. We are still in relationship as a girlfriend and boyfriend until nowadays. We fall in love since we are in Highschool. Day by day, when I grow up , I getting more scare . The more I grow , the more I scare . You know what ? Because I know that my parents won’t approve us. Yes. I know that is not easy to get through that situation. To make the reader more Easy to understand : ( Rich & Poor ). I know that is too hard . Really hard to fight it . To my man ❤️, he was working so hard day by day . He was thinking so much day by day . Everything he did just wants to get me and live with me . I know that he won’t give up until we still strong to fight. But time fly to fast and the hope are less . The thing has change . And I asked myself , if I didn’t agree to love him . Maybe he have more freedom than with me . If I didn’t love him , maybe he not really get too hard for me . If I reject on that day , maybe he not get too much pressure , too much stress and too much overthinking. He also know that , it too hard to get me . But he will try again and again until he give up. He still try too hard for me . I didn’t regret because I love him . But I regret that I love him and make him more difficult because of me . Everything is my false. We have been talk each about that situation. And I still can’t accept it . That why I always cry every night I went to sleep. It too hard to stay far aways from the man I love the most. Our story are too complicated and too long. But I hide that feeling for many years . I didn’t told my boyfriend about that but he knew that I am stress about that so much and overthinking . But he didn’t knew that I had cry so hard every night . I really t hope that I can stay with him❤️. I love you so much 💕. Note: It quite too long about my story . And I am sorry if my English not really good . Because I am poor with English. Thank for those who read my story. Big thank to this page that help me to talk about my story out. Even not help me 100% . But at least 50% help a lots to share my story and let them know my story . #Thankeveryone. #Thankknongjitpage

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Nightmare

I have a secret that I need to tell. A secret that has made me live in hell. It was quite a long time ago, I was s€xual harassed by someone I trusted and thought of as family. I alternated between guilt for let it happened, feeling dirty and unable to get clean. I haven’t told my parents or his parents because I’m sacred of victims blaming culture in this society. I don’t even told my friends about it either not because of victims blaming but I just can’t talking about it. Lately, something so miniscule triggered me and it’s unbearable. It ended up being connected to my nightmare again and it changed my quality of life. I thought that it was no longer bothered me anymore but it doesn’t. I’m terrified every time I smells the same cologne that he used. I went through “I hate all men” phase. It’s certainly changed my view of men, I’ll be never be able to look at men entirely the same way again. It’s my first time to talk about it since it has happened. Thanks, admin for letting me share it with KnongJit.

Feeling and reason are at war...

It was not right how I thought I could control my feelings since I was traumatized by how I was treated... It was not right how I thought my emotions could be detached if I belived so... It was not right how you just became a part of me, my emotion, my life without me knowing... It was not right how it could affect me this much just by not getting your text... I mean since when have you become this important to me? For some reasons, I think we have the mutual feelings, but it is just not right for us to be together because we are traumatized by our experiences, is it? Or has it been one-sided? I just feel confused and I fear that it would take too much time to move on... becuase you are always on my mind now. Us being able to talk again or not, I am not sure. What I am sure is that talking to you was one best experience. I enjoy it and I hope you feel the same. :)

Thank you for your caring!! #s

Since I broke up with my ex bf in March 2021, I never had any bf until now. Not because I didn’t fall in love with anyone else. It’s because I used to asked s1 abt feeling during I broke up. And the answer is “ death both side”xD. And yeah at the time he’s the only person that I chatted with, told him how’s my feelings, sometime cried while sending my voice to him. Then we haven’t chatted for awhile. Currently, And he just text me and get on with each again.

If only~ (part2)

In case someone said I'm trying to ruin other family, I have to say it first. I never had any intention to ruin his marriage just because some memories. He and his wife deserve to be happy and live their life. I'm just a part of his past. I'm also a woman and I won't do anything that could hurt another woman. Please don't take my confession to the wrong way!!!

May be I actually like you

Your action is confusing me for some point, I’m fluttering but at the same times I wonder that’s how you act around others as well. You’re an introvert the same as I am. You’re simple but yet the coolest person I’ve ever met. I literally never had loved experience before so it’s really hard for me just to know how I feel, and it’s much harder to know yours. I like you so much dear <8 I really wish we are reciprocated but I’m too dumb in this kind of things.

Always be you

I never regret choosing you so please don’t worry about me leaving you. I hope you know and realize your worth cause you’ll always be my first choice.

Have you met the one who is "better" that your friends always said "You deserve better" yet?

Been in many toxic relationships. Been as a please person. Been loving controller, narcissist, and who doesn't value my love for them. I'm tired but they said "Keep being nice, loyal, and faithful in relationship and soon you will find someone you deserve". So have you found her/him yet? Would you stop being faithful cause of how you been treated? Or wait until the "better" one coming?

My Fault

-N💗 Im sorry for hurting you. It was childish of me to do that to you. I don’t expect u to forgive me. I wish I could take every ounce of pain u feel right now. I love you, always. #221020