08

You live in peace I live in pain.

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

The good guy

ធ្លាប់ជួបមនុស្សដែលអ្នកតែងតែប្រាថ្នាអត់? យើងធ្លាប់តែស្រឡាញ់មនុស្សម្នាក់ហើយ ចូលចិត្តស្រឡាញ់ម្នាក់ហ្នឹងក្នុងរូបភាពនៃការស្រម៉ៃរបស់ខ្លួនឯង ដែលយើងហៅថា "Falling in love with the idea of the person"។ ប៉ុន្តែអ្នកធ្លាប់គិតអត់ថាមនុស្សដែលអ្នកសម្រម៉ៃក្នុងខួរក្បាលហ្នឹង អាចនឹងជាមនុស្សពិតប្រាកដក្នុងជីវិតពិត? សង្ឃឹមតិចណាស់មែនអត់? អ្នកក៏ធ្លាប់ស្រម៉ៃថា បើម្នាក់ហ្នឹងចេះសួរសុខទុក្ខយើងរាល់ថ្ងៃ បារម្ភ ផ្ដល់ក្ដីស្រឡាញ់ នាំយើងញ៉ាំអីដែលយើងចូលចិត្ត សួរនាំពីអ្វីគ្រប់យ៉ាងដែលយើងចង់បាន លើកទឹកចិត្តយើងរហូតក្នុងការងារ ឬអ្វីដែលយើងធ្វើ...មិនដឹងយើងស្រឡាញ់ម្នាក់ហ្នឹងប៉ុណ្ណាទេ។ ជឿអត់ថាការស្រម៉ៃមួយហ្នឹងក្លាយជាការពិត? មិនដឹងថាទេវតាទើបតែស្ដាប់ឮពាក្យបន់ស្រន់របស់ខ្ញុំឬយ៉ាងណាទេ ប៉ុន្តែខ្ញុំក៏បានជួបម្នាក់នោះ។ គេមិនមែនស្រឡាញ់តែខ្ញុំទេ គេយកចិត្តទុកដាក់ទាំងគ្រួសារខ្ញុំ គេល្អមករហូត ព្រោះមិនមែនជាសកម្មភាពដែលយើងធ្លាប់ឃើញមនុស្សប្រុសល្អដាក់យើងតែដំបូងទេ។ គេបន្តសកម្មភាពនោះច្រើនខែណាស់។ ពេលវេលាចេះតែដើរទៅមុខ ទង្វើរបស់គេមិនមែនខ្សោយទៅៗទេ ប៉ុន្តែគេកាន់តែល្អជាងមុន កាន់ធ្វើឲខ្ញុំមានអារម្មណ៍ថា ម្នាក់នេះខុសពីអ្នកដទៃ។ ខ្ញុំចាប់អារម្មណ៍ដឹងថាគេជា មនុស្សដែលខ្ញុំតែងតែប្រាថ្នា ជាមនុស្សដែលខ្ញុំហៅថា "idea of the person I love"។ ពេលដែលខ្ញុំដឹងហើយ ខ្ញុំបានផ្ដល់ឱកាសឲខ្លួនឯងបើកចិត្តទទួលយកគេ ព្រោះខ្ញុំមានអារម្មណ៍ថា ខ្ញុំនិងគេដូចជា 2 broken souls ជួបគ្នាចឹង។ ខ្ញុំគិតថាដល់ពេលដែលអាចសាកទៅជិតគេជាងនេះ ស្គាល់ពីគេជាងនេះ ទើបពួកយើងបានជួបគ្នានៅក្រៅ។ ការដែលជួបគ្នានៅក្រៅ គេក៏នៅតែល្អចឹង និយាយទៅដូច បានជួបការស្រម៉ៃខ្លួនឯងក្នុងជីវិតពិតចឹង។ តែអ្នកទាំងអស់គ្នាដឹងថាចម្លែកម៉េចអត់? អារម្មណ៍ខ្ញុំ!! គឺវា!! អត់មាន😞។ ឲនិយាយថាម៉េចទៅ?? ខ្ញុំប្រហែលជាអត់ស្រឡាញ់គេទេ!! ហើយអ្នកអានឆ្ងល់អត់ ថាម៉េចអត់ស្រឡាញ់បើល្អចឹងហើយ?? ខ្ញុំឆ្លើយអត់ចេញទេ។ គ្រាន់តែដឹងថាខ្ញុំបានប្រើពេលវេលា ព្យាយាមស្រឡាញ់គាត់ ព្រោះខ្ញុំដឹងក្នុងចិត្តថាគាត់ជាមនុស្សដ៏សែនល្អ ហើយខ្ញុំមិនដឹងពេលណាបានជួបមនុស្សល្អដូចគាត់ទៀតទេ។ ខ្ញុំចាប់ផ្ដើមកុហកខ្លួនឯង ថាប្រហែលជាមិនទាន់ស្រឡាញ់ ឬត្រូវការពេលបន្តិចទៀត...។ ប៉ុន្តែខ្ញុំអាត្មានិយមណាស់! បើអត់ស្រឡាញ់គេហើយ ម៉េចមិនប្រាប់គេ? ខ្ញុំអត់ទាន់ចង់បដិសេធព្រោះខ្ញុំចង់ស្រឡាញ់គេវិញដូចគ្នា។ អ្នកណាចង់បោះចោលមនុស្សល្អចឹង? មកដល់ពេលហ្នឹងទើបយល់ថាទេវតាឆ្លើយតបហ្នឹងការប្រាថ្នារបស់ខ្ញុំ ដោយឲខ្ញុំជួបមនុស្សក្នុងក្ដីស្រម៉ៃ ប៉ុន្តែខ្ញុំភ្លេចគិតថា ស្នេហាមិនមែនស្រឡាញ់តែម្ខាងទេ។ ខ្ញុំតែងសុំឲជួបមនុស្សដែលស្រឡាញ់ខ្ញុំ ប៉ុន្តែ ខ្ញុំមិនដែលធ្លាប់ប្រាថ្នាឲជួបមនុស្សដែលខ្លួនស្រឡាញ់ទេ។ យើងពិតជាមិនអាចព្រោះតែគេជាមនុស្សល្អ ត្រូវកុហកគេ និងកុហកខ្លួនឯងដើម្បីបោកប្រាស់ក្ដីស្រឡាញ់របស់គេទេ។ ចុងក្រោយគឺខ្ញុំសម្រេចចិត្ត និយាយការពិត ព្រោះទោះយូរប៉ុណ្ណាក៏មិនអាចឲចិត្តនេះស្រឡាញ់គេ ដូចដែលគេស្រឡាញ់ខ្ញុំដែរ។ ពួកយើងមាននិស្ស័យត្រឹមស្គាល់ បេះដូងគ្នា តែក៏មិនបានមានពេលវេលានៅក្បែរ ថែរក្សាយូរដែរ។ ខ្ញុំដឹងថាមនុស្សល្អមិនងាយរកបាន ប៉ុន្តែព្រោះតែអ្នកជាមនុស្សល្អ ខ្ញុំរឹតតែចង់ឲអ្នកជួបនឹងមនុស្សដែលអាចផ្ដល់ក្ដីស្រឡាញ់ឲអ្នកវិញដូចគ្នា។ និយាយដល់ចំណុចនេះទើបដឹងថា ក្ដីស្រឡាញ់គឺឋិតនៅលើយើងខ្លួនឯង វាអត់ឋិតនៅលើទង្វើរបស់ម្ខាងទៀតទេ ព្រោះមិនថាគេល្អយ៉ាងណា អាក្រក់យ៉ាងណា, បើស្រឡាញ់គឺស្រឡាញ់ បើអត់គឺអត់ហើយ។ រឿងនេះដូច តួឯកស្រី បដិសេធតួរងប្រុសចឹង។ អ្នកមើលឆ្ងល់ណាស់ម៉េចតួឯកស្រី មិនស្រឡាញ់តួរងប្រុសហ្នឹងចឹង ទាំងដែលតួរងប្រុសលះបង់គ្រប់យ៉ាង ហើយល្អគ្រប់10។ ពេលនេះខ្ញុំយល់អារម្មណ៍ហ្នឹងហើយ គ្រាន់តែរឿងខ្ញុំគ្មានតួឯកប្រុសទេ ហើយក៏មិនដឹងថា ថ្ងៃក្រោយតួឯកប្រុស ចេញមុខឲអ្នកទាំងអស់គ្នាអានឬក៏អត់ដែរ។ ដឹងត្រឹមថា I feel stupid for letting a good guy go, but at least I don't lie to anybody.

2025-08-14

Should I confess?

I have been friends with this guy for a few months now, but I only recognized him for about 2-3 weeks. I think I am developing feelings for him. The main thing is that he is very active and caring, so with all of his kindness, I tend to think that I am special, despite that, he does that to literally everyone. Should I risk everything and ask him to go on a date or something? I know that he will definitely friendzone me because I joined the "GANG" now.

2025-08-14

A Good friend but A Bad lover.

Have you ever wondered about yourself that you get along with people so well, you adapt yourself into everyone's comfy zone, but they can't adapt back to you. I, myself, have been into so many situations where the person i loved couldn't bare to love me back. We both felt the same way for each other. But when it comes to relationship, It's became so weird and it gets to the point where both of us should part ways and stay friend. Things weren't like that when we were friend. It gets complicated when we both push the boundary. Was it my fault? Until thesedays i still have the same questions running around my head, living rent free. Where/What did i do wrong?.

2025-08-14

🥑

Just because I'm okay now doesn't mean that the feeling I lost will come back.

2025-08-14

What was all that for?

(I have wrote my first sentence and deleted it so many times, I lost count. So here goes nothing.) ....When we first met, I had no idea how much you could mean to me. You stayed when I needed you most, you told me I'm loved, and you held my hands through one of the hardest times in my life. But my heart shattered when I say, it was a false start to my cruel fairytale. You have made me surrendered, I gave you my all. I had never felt so deeply for anyone, and you knew how to make me fell for you. Maybe my love spoiled you, because darling you have changed. From the woman who could no wrong, to your worst enemy. It could be the day I breathed the wrong way, asked you the wrong question, said what you did upset me, asking too many questions. Those things made you reset me. Am I to walk on eggshells around you if we want to be together? Am I just to be the person you pick up the phone whenever you feel like calling? Am I to be the one you apologize and make amends? Am I the one to always be dealt a lower hand? Is it wrong to want to feel loved my the person you feel so deeply for? Is it wrong to want your partner to care about you? Is it wrong to not want to be ignored for hours? I never regretted the love I gave you. But my biggest regret was I had convinced myself that you cared for months. I let it continued when I knew there was no way I can live with this forever. I used to think that having you smiling at me a few times was better than none. Having you for an hour to myself was better than not talking to you at all. How it broke my heart to admit the truth today, you had no idea how much you hurt me. I wonder if you cared, you probably don't. I don't think you ever did in the recent months. This is my peace offering to you, I'm leaving. DONE. I'm done making excuses for you, I'm done being treated like the person you hated. I'm most certainly done with being your last priority. I don't know what love should be, but I'm sure as hell our relationship isn't what love supposed to be. I'm writing this to all my girls out there, when things changed. You know. No matter how many times you have lied to yourself for him, you can't lie forever. If he truly wants to be with you, you will know. And when you do, leave.

2025-08-14

Comeback

Please don't ever come back to me when I finally forgot you and has moved on. Please don't let me experience all the pain again. Please don't ever mess up my life again.

2025-08-14

The Awkwardness

I have been in relationship for almost 10 months with my sweetie, and I always call myself “Nhom” instead of “Bong”. Some times I called myself “Bong”, but I didn’t get the response with the word “Oun” so I feel shy. Will it make my love faded away? Do you think it will make our relationship be apart ?

2025-08-14

Those days

One day, we were mentally and physically inseparable, and today, you are trying to avoid me. All the good days we spent together, I hope you still remember those days like I do. The days we shared our personal feelings and daily lives’ activities. I hope those days wouldn’t be forgotten in just a short period of time. If I were to be granted one wish, I wish those days happened once again. Even though what comes after hurt both of us and could potentially hurt people we are with, those days were the best days I could ever ask for.