You live in peace I live in pain.
This isn't really a confession about anything, but more like an announcement. I don't know if I will be able to continue this thing we called living any longer. I guess it like I'm running away but I don't think I can keep doing this so when I hit my 20th birthday, I think I'm going to kill myself. I think it gonna be the right thing to do because I'm pretty worthless and my life meant nothing so yea. Cheer to the next 2 months of my life.
Remember when we used to say we will meet? Remember when you said you were so eager to meet me? Remember how we were happily discussed about this so call date and plan it all out perfectly? Remember how you and I both had our hands on our first date gift for each other? I still had those photos of our gifts which we had sent to one another. But now, where was it? Where had it gone to? Where are you? Just how cruel are you leaving me all alone in this world before we could ever meet. Just…why? Why did you have to leave so soon? It’s been 1 year and a half since you’re gone from this world. May your beautiful soul be at ease. You are the most beautiful human I ever meet.
I cant stop thinking about suicide. I don't know. There's nothing much about the problem i've got but i just dunno how to solve it and i cannot think how to too. I cant tell anyone anymore, just like they'll just judge me and thinking im attention seeker. (Even here now, i have no confidence writing this without thinking they will judge me) Stuck on anything, and my mind keep telling me "if you die that'll be solve cuz it's you, you are the problem." I really am maybe... I'm sorry if I ruin your day, really sorry.
Dating suppose to be people being in love with each other but for me it’s different, i’ve been in multiple relationships and its always just them giving and showing me love and affection while i’ve never actually fallen in love with them. Doesn’t mean that i don’t love them, i do but i don’t feel the spark or the exciting feeling when i’m with them. And i never get jealous maybe it’s because i’m not in love with them that’s why i never feel jealous over anything.
Consider this a respond to #KJ0061 – as a fellow person with ADHD (side note: ADHD more common than you might think). ADHD is often not talked about here (our country) and more often than not, this neurodivergent behavior is misjudged for laziness and reckless. There are many forms of ADHD, but in my specific case, I often hyper fixate on things and lose feelings really fast. I can start a new hobby and forget about it the next day. I can place my keys somewhere and would lose it just as quickly. In class, it is very difficult to concentrate and online class isn’t making it any easier. I often find myself fall short when it comes to tasks such as organizing and planning. I would forget to bring even the simplest thing. I’m always running late for class, and falling behind on certain tasks. That doesn’t mean that I am unable to do anything just like the neurotypical (people with normal brain). It just take a lot more effort. Some of you will never understand how much effort it takes for a person with AHDH to bring everything to class, complete assignments on time and manage their time. It’s not impossible, but it takes us so much effort just to seem normal. I try my best to walk at the same pace as the neurotypical, but I’m sure many people with AHDH struggle more than me. If you’re reading this, be kind to people who you think might have ADHD. Maybe it’s not that they don’t try. Maybe it’s very, very, very hard for them to do the simplest things. Be understanding.
One Tip I have learnt and I wanna share: Before you let someone into your life, ask them this question “ Do you love yourself enough?” Because only the people who love themselves, can give love.❤️🙂 If they couldn’t love themselves, all they can do it depends on your love to have their happiness and they couldn’t give you the love you deserve, and if you couldn’t satisfy them, they will cheat by finding other to full fill their need ❤️🖋 Hope everyone find a significant other and treat you right, don settle for less❤️🌟
មកដល់ពេលនេះ វាប្រហែលជាមានរយៈពេលជិត ៧ឆ្នាំហើយដែលខ្ញុំលួចស្រលាញ់អ្នក។ តាមពិតទៅខ្ញុំក៏ធ្លាប់ព្យាយាមកាត់ចិត្តពីអ្នក ធ្លាប់ទៅកន្លែងមួយឆ្ងាយដើម្បីកុំអោយជួបអ្នក ធ្លាប់ព្យាយាមមើលអ្នកថ្មីជាច្រើនសារ ប៉ុន្តែមនុស្សដែលខ្ញុំនឹកដល់មុនគេនៅតែជាអ្នក។ រយៈពេលកន្លងមកនេះ ខ្ញុំពិតជាចង់ដឹងណាស់ថា អ្នកទុកខ្ញុំជាអ្វី?ដែលមានចិត្តចំពោះខ្ញុំទេ? ហេតុអីក៏ធ្វើល្អដាក់ខ្ញុំយ៉ាងនេះ?ហេតុអីក៏ពេលនោះអ្នកមានគេ?ហេតុអីពេលដែលមានគេ អ្នកម្ដងក៏ជាន់ឈ្លឺខ្ញុំ ម្ដងក៏លើកតម្កើងខ្ញុំ? ដែលមានអារម្មណ៍ថាខុសចំពោះខ្ញុំទេ? តែខ្ញុំពិតជាគ្មានភាពក្លាហានដើម្បីសួរអ្នកឡើយ សូម្បីតែជួបមុខអ្នកក៏ខ្ញុំមិនហ៊ានផង ខ្ញុំសង្ឃឹមថាថ្ងៃណាមួយខ្ញុំនឹងមានឱកាស យកសំបុត្រការគប់ចំកណ្ដាលមុខអ្នក ហើយក៏សួរថា មានអារម្មណ៍យ៉ាងណាដែរ អតីតមនុស្សជាទីស្រលាញ់
Thought I’ve moved on. Thought u have nomo potential over me. Thought I’ve alr got u out of this place of mine which is called “heart”. But looking back at it, I still found myself searching for you everywhere I go, skimming through every picture of u I saved, imagining how we’ll be if we’re still tgt these days…..and that’s when I realized I’ve never step out to anywhere & move on as I’ve once committed at all cuz without u everywhere I go everything I do seems to have a missing hole & got me feeling empty. How we ended up still aches in me up to these days that it got me thinking why does it has to be that way when everything has solution but we decided to end it all up instead of solving it. Still friend. Still viewing each other’s stories.Still stalking.Still wondering what u’re doing, what u’re up to, how’ve u been. U are the reason I opened my heart & also the reason no one will see it again. Admitted it was indeed a bad timing between us back in the day but I still preciate how we tried to stick with it for so long even tho we both kno we won’t make it after all. As for every memories we’ve created, every step we’ve walked through tgt, every problems we’ve faced & solved, every place we went. I’ll save a spot for every of that cuz I dun want to 4get you & every piece of us. Last words for u: If there’s a day u decided to turn back, u’ll always see me here waitin for you cuz I don’t want no other shade of blue but u. #S to #R