Realization

It's been a while since our last conversation, at first I've gone through many hardships and confusion, wondering what was the real reason. After some time have passed I've come to the realization stage where I realized many things. I realized what is the thing that makes you upset, the words I could say, and the actions that I could do to make things better. I understand why you always want me to change. I'm so happy to see that you're doing well with your life journey right now. I wish that one day you can open up for me once again and I'll make sure that you meet a better version of me. I don't want you to build me for another person.

Feeling bottled up?

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A bad friend

This is not a story but it is a apology letter to my friend. I am sorry for being a bad friend. I am sorry that for these past days, I’ve been ignoring you. It is not your fault but it is mine. The reason is because I am mad of myself. I am mad because I am such a horrible friend for getting jealous of you. I envy everything about you; however, this envy turns into jealousy. Your studies are going very great, you got a real job and you manage to make lots of friend. While me on the other hand, my studies is going down, I don’t even have a real job and I barely make any friends. You are such a great friend to me. I am very happy seeing you on your way to your success, but I couldn’t help to compare your success with my failure. I sincerely apologize to you my friend. It was wrong of me to get jealous. I won’t ask you for your forgiveness. Please continue on your great journey to success my dear friend.

Being used

Doesn't it feel so sh*tty to be used by someone we care about whether it be friends or someone you have feelings for? Like they would only think of us when they need us for some reasons. When we are out of use, they would completely ignore our existence. I felt like an idiot for assuming that the person slightly thinks about me sometimes. The truth is I only cross their mind when I can offer them some sort of benefits. Now that I recall the time they said we're close, I cringe so hard and feel so stupid.

To strong

I heard people said "when u are a girl and u're strong is hard for a man to catch u up. Because when u sad or depress and in a hard situation u never need ur man to comfort u cause u can deal it on ur own. That will make up think u are strong enough to deal with ur proplem and he is too useless and starting to distance himself from u cause he think u are to high like a star for him to catch and he to weak, not a man who u deserve". I think they are right. I had been in 3relatio ahips now. The reason of my break up are I am to strong and i never show my weakness and even not talk about my things to my man, so they broke up with me. They never knew i am living a misirible life. I had all kind of pain and trying really hard each day until everything become a habbit. The pain can hurt me anymore.

#Sam_ort?

I caught myself being loyal to a man who ain’t even my boyfriend.🙂

I will always love you

It is really hard to let go of you oun. I know that you are facing a mental problems and yeah we broke up months ago due to my ex breaking both of us up...I just want you to know that I won't be giving up on you and hoping one day you shall return to me. Please don't believe nor falling for those horrible things she said. Remembering those hard time we've been together....It really hits me most of the time because of all those struggling time I've been facing there will always be you whom is consulting me and even calm me down. I Hope You Are Coming Back Soon. I promised you that one day we will be holding each other hands in front of our parents. Moonlight ;))

Being with ppl pleaser is tiring

We broken up alr but we promised to still support one another when in need (mentally and physically). When I was down and feel like I need support from u the most, u never there. I’m trying to contact u, ur phone is always busy, I message u, u don’t reply, I’m desperately waiting u at school, u’re sneakingly left without me knowing and go for drinking with ur “team”. Bold of me to assumed that u changed. One of the big reason why I decided to walk away is b’cuz it’s consuming so much of my energy. I’m tired of being left alone, I’m tired of being ur second choice, I’m tired of one side communication, I’m tired of not being heard and understood, I’m tired of not feeling validated. I never feel loved, I feel miserable being with u. Whenever I feel like I’m in confusion with my feelings whether my decision was right or wrong, u always prove me that I should never go back to u, because u always make me feel like shit. It’s torturing being like this. I don’t hate u and I don’t think I will, but u always disappoint me in every way possible.

Im still in love with her

since we broke up, i have always missed her no matter whose im with. i used to be so happy that we broke up but i guess not anymore when i see her with someone new, we have been broken up for more than 2 years but i still can't forget her. Can somebody tell me what's wrong with me ?

If you’re happy, I’m happy.

One of my male colleagues and I are so close, but the closest thing I mentioned was that I'm the one who's trying to get close to him. I think I like him a lot, but I'm not daring to tell him. I don't want to ruin the relationship between us. It was good enough for me to have him during my stressful times, happy times, busy times, and anytime I needed him. I'm so grateful. Even if in the future you're not mine, I believe you will be a good husband to your future wife like how you're treating me these days. I'm a bit jealous of whoever deserves you, but if you're happy, I'm happy too. Day by day, my day becomes more and more colorful and shines since I have you by my side. You're so good for my mental health. It was so boring when you were complaining about this and that, but it is so empty without those complaints. I want you, the person who is giving me these good feelings, to feel them as well; to feel loved by someone; to feel treated well; and to be my lover, so I don't have to worry about your future wife. Thank you for being there for me during my hard times. I really appreciated every moment I had with you.