If it’s that hard.

Why don't you just say it if you no longer want to talk. It hurts me but It’s probably easier for either of us and you have to leave me alone and waiting for your replies for hours or even days. It’s so exhausted to question my own worth. Just spill it out and let’s move on.

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

Where I stand

Day by day, I started to know where I stand in everyone’s life. I’m that friend who is there when they need something. I’m that daughter who is responsible for every big and little things inside and outside the household. I’m that granddaughter who is just a female. I’m that sister who doesn’t deserve the respect. I’m that niece who got compared with the cousins’ parents and got hated by my own cousins. I’m that girlfriend who loves too much and also being a little too much that sometimes it suffocates him. Every eyes and words that look and say to me, make me feel small worthless. Whenever i try to explain what happen and both me, I got shouted back, not listening to me, first they comfort and still act the same. It’s hard coming home everyday and get the cold look from everyone and no one in the house actually talking to you. I have to repeat myself over 3 times to get the answer or someone attention. The only time I get someone to care enough for my well-being or existence is when I commit suicide.

2025-08-14

To PetPet

Nirk bong nas, jong orb . Nirk klang 😭😭
2025-08-14

I miss me, being with you

Throw back to yr 1, I think I had the most beautiful moment crushing on someone. She's my first love, I'm just not lucky enough to make her mine. Plus I crushed on her knowing she got a boyfriend. We became close, probably because of our personalities match and had alot of things in common. I think she is a type I always ask for. We got the same age, but she is so much more mature. She cared and noticed every little thing about me. She always make me feel special. Sometimes, we hold hands in the mall and during class. She used to called me her soulmate. We are lovebird in our class. I kept rejecting, saying no when our classmates talked about us as a couple.(inside, smiling and wishing it was true) xD I really miss me being with her. I miss reading book, paying attention in class, finishing my homework, learning new things, improving my grammar, caring my own health, going to gym, eating healthy food, being kind to other, fullfiling my commitment, keep things under control, keeping my promise, calming down my anger, being a reasonable person, being okay to say sorry. I miss being a better person, just to catch her attention. I miss trying to be a person that come in package. Being an understanding, a sweet, responsible, respectful and a romantic boyfriend, that she always wanted. I remembered days, the first thing I do when I got school is looking for her white scoopy and pink helmet. Everytime I saw her motor at the parking lot, I was so happy going to class, knowing I'm going to see her in any minute soon. Till today, with a little pain in my heart, such a warming one, I still can say I'm glad not telling her about my feeling toward her. We are now still friend, kinda close as before. I got a girlfriend, and sometimes I run to her when I fight with my girlfriend. She's still the same, being an understanding one, giving advice and comfort with care. I'm glad, staying in her life in a position that I able to hear everything about her, everything she wanna talk and going through. I'm glad being a shoulder she can cry on, playing her hair, stabbing her head gently anytime I want to. I am now graduated 3yr already. If I can keep it this long time, I really wish this can be forever. I think I am now being selfish. The thought of losing her is really scary. PS: I am gay.
2025-08-14

Unforgettable

Well, we started off at a good term but i’ll just say we’re not mature enough to make this last longer. For all these months, i was genuinely happy as you can see I appreciated every moment with u because all the time we spent tgt I was happy. Remember one rainy night, that was our first time riding motorcycle under the rain i hugged you tight from behind “ it was one of the best feelin ever. I wish i can have this moment with you once last time but i guess my wish will never come true. Anyway thank you for the hoodie you gave with your scent on it promise i’ll keep it here forever ( it was my first time wore boyfriend hoodie as well ) I wish I could just learn how to unloved and deleted u out of my head the simplest manner. U’re my favorite person, but maybe favorite don't really mean to be last forever? I wish I could talk to you again the same way we did before, because I freakin damn miss you. Every single thing about you right now already causing me pain that I keep seeing you in my dreams, ur words, ur face and i still can feel ur touches. How could I move on? I wish I was once crossed ur mind and you miss me just as much as i did too. Im sorry it was my mistake and i just wanna let you know that Im happy that at least we made it here. Thank you for all the wonderful memories lover❤️ I love you so much.

2025-08-14

Friendship

I don’t want to think negative in our friendships. But since this happened, i do feel i was ignored from all of you. I’m really disappointed honestly but I can’t tell. I don’t expect anything from you but sometimes I hurt myself. If you see this, don’t ask me if it’s mine cuz that’s mine.

2025-08-14

....!!!!

ពួកយើងទាំងពីរនាក់ត្រឡប់មកinrelationshipវិញ ប៉ុន្តែអ្នកមិនដូចមុននេាះទេ។ អ្នកព្រងើយនឹងខ្ញុំខ្លាំងណាស់។ ខ្ញុំដឹងថាពេលដែរពួកយើងbroke upអ្នកក៏ធ្លាប់មានgirlfriendsរហូតមក។ ដូច្នេះហើយពេលដែរអ្នកត្រូវគ្នាជាមួយខ្ញុំវិញអ្នកព្រងើយនឹងខ្ញុំ អ្នកគិតថាមានខ្ញុំក៏បាន អត់ខ្ញុំក៏បាន។ ខ្ញុំដឹងថាទេាះជាខ្ញុំនិយាយច្រើន ក៏អត់ប្រយោជន៍ដែរ ព្រោះពាក្យសម្ដីខ្ញុំលែងសំខាន់សម្រាប់អ្នកដូចមុនទៀតហើយ។ គ្រប់យ៉ាងជាកំហុសរបស់ខ្ញុំ ទើបរឿងរ៉ាវវាបែបនេះ។ខ្ញុំតែងតែគិតថាអ្នកនិងខ្ញុំនឹងអាចឆ្លងកាត់គ្រប់ឧបសគ្គ តស៊ូជាមួយគ្នា កាន់ដៃគ្នាដល់ថ្ងៃអនាគត ប៉ុន្តែមិនដឹងថាអាចទៅរួចប្ញអត់ទេ ព្រេាះអ្នកមិនសូវអើពើនឹងខ្ញុំដូចមុនសេាះ។ អ្នកតែងនិយាយថាអ្នកនឹងមិនទៅណាចេាលខ្ញុំទេ ខ្ញុំនឹងចាំមើលថាតើទង្វើអ្នកដូចពាក្យសម្ដីអ្នកដែរទេ!ប៉ុន្តែបើសិនអ្នកនៅក្បែរខ្ញុំអ្នកមិនមានក្ដីសុខ មិនសប្បាយចិត្តដូចមុនហើយអ្នកចង់ត្រឡប់ទៅរកគេវិញ អ្នកក៏ប្រាប់ខ្ញុំត្រង់ៗមក!!!បើអ្នកស្រឡាញ់ខ្ញុំពិត អ្នកកុំលាក់បាំងនឹងខ្ញុំ កុំកុហកខ្ញុំ កុំក្បត់ខ្ញុំ កុំចែកចាយក្ដីស្រឡាញ់ឱ្យនារីដទៃ(កុំfriendly with girlsពេក) មានរឿងអ្វីត្រូវសួរនាំគ្នា លើកលែងឱ្យគ្នាទៅវិញទៅមក ផ្ដល់ពេលវេលាឲ្យគ្នាតាមដែរអាចធ្វើទៅបាន...!!ហើយខ្ញុំសង្ឃឹមថាពួកយើងនឹងអាចfix what happened in the past.ហើយរក្សាទំនាក់ទំនងមួយនេះឲ្យល្អប្រសើរ! #ពីមនុស្សស្រីម្នាក់ដែរធ្លាប់ធ្វើខុសដាក់អ្នក ធ្លាប់ធ្វើឲ្យអ្នកឈឺចាប់!!
2025-08-14

Everytime w/ u is special and i luv being ur. Can’t unlove u*

Perhaps power is letting go of the grips of the past and standing empty handed in the future. It all come down to the last person i think of at night. That’s my heart is. The people that are quick to walk away are the one who never intended to stay. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that given us. And then we decided to distance between us define our love. And once my bestfri said “my standard is not to ask anyone to stay , If they want to leave , let them . Even we broken but im still support u behind ur back if u success one day. Maybe in the future we cross each other path and grow a little more so we can be tgt again , im hopefully. Anyway im more me now like im matured. I love myself more than before. I can say im better. I know my value. Im stronger. I did everything for myself and for u. So friendly reminder: Dont give all your love to only one person because u should love urself first before others , if u won’t, u will hurt in the end.
2025-08-14

To someone I shouldn’t miss

Hey So….., how are u doing? I still miss you, miss how we talk, how you sing to me at night, how you asked me about everything. I just want to hit you up again. Shall you give me a chance? I know this message seem so toxic but I really miss you…