If only~

I always wonder what if we met each other when I'm mature, will things be different? I was too immature at that time and a hot headed person. I would be lying If I said I didn't love u. I felt the energy that u might be the one that I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. It might sounds ridiculous but I totally felt like it when I first known u. I know u loved me too and trying to win me back too. When we broke up, I hated u and ignore ur message even though u tried to reach me. U added me back even when I unfriend u and that friend request stayed there until u finally moved on. I totally forgot about u when I'm focusing on my study and when I went back and see those messages u sent. My heart dropped but too late that I can't go back. I had things that I have to complete first and u told me that u'll wait for me. I told u countless of time that I won't change my mind no matter what. I'm thankful that u tried ur best on me Bong. I'm glad When I saw u finally moving on. I'm glad that I set u free and u found someone u could spent the rest of ur life with. Though many years had past, u're still the best person I've ever dated and I don't want anything beside ur happiness. Sincerely, I wish u all the best in ur marriage bong. #2017

Feeling bottled up?

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A bestie

Hey Bxtch! I kinda miss the way that we joke around, go everywhere tgt, advising each other, caring each other, worrying each other, informing each other most of the time. til the day that we kinda officially separated, i dun think that it was a great way to be like that for both us, i think we might hurt both side. yess bestie! It alr long time ago, I think i can forget u, but i dun think so. everywhere we went, it left the footprint, even i date s1 and i saw that places, it left us behind. it's such a great time that we spent tgt, i literally miss everything we've been done. And I wish to say sorry to u for not catching up with u for so long, but i dun mean so. I can't help myself for not to be inlove with u, that must be the reason. yeah! but sometimes i do stalk u, and i dun feel too, yap, actually it is. I know u r with a great person, and i hope that he takes care of u better much better than i used to. From a good fri...

“B” V&V 🤡

F u for making me feel like this. I told u I’m not experienced in this kind of things but still u did that mind game, and when I start to treat u how u treat me u got all mad and offended. And it really sucks when everyone tell me I should hate u but I just can’t. F that really

Another lost battle

I build a dream to be free, to write my own story, to dominate my destiny. I lose my sleep fighting for victory, gather my energy to outrun difficulty. But fate has never favored me and luck has never served me. I know my tears and dedication and the struggle to reach my passion. But my ambition and expectation crush down to disappointment. Now I'm all broken. In dark moment, I'm getting away from the sky like I never ever gonna fly again. Will I discover my light and light up my dark night? Will all my trial someday win over all the fight? Maybe someday, I will reach the peak and claim my championship. Cus with new hope, my faith in me is reignited.

Unsure feeling

Both of us ignore each other, but I’m the only one who feel so uneasy and hurt. Because I do it on purpose, mute his account and try so frkin hard to ignore the pink ring around his ig pf. But he ignore me so effortlessly :> like how cool I want to be cool like you so bad. And yep it would be funny to say we’re not lover just two person who hid themselves behind the wall but end up open up to each other. I don’t know if that fate or just random encounter but I do appreciated all those unsure moments.

Being with ppl pleaser is tiring

We broken up alr but we promised to still support one another when in need (mentally and physically). When I was down and feel like I need support from u the most, u never there. I’m trying to contact u, ur phone is always busy, I message u, u don’t reply, I’m desperately waiting u at school, u’re sneakingly left without me knowing and go for drinking with ur “team”. Bold of me to assumed that u changed. One of the big reason why I decided to walk away is b’cuz it’s consuming so much of my energy. I’m tired of being left alone, I’m tired of being ur second choice, I’m tired of one side communication, I’m tired of not being heard and understood, I’m tired of not feeling validated. I never feel loved, I feel miserable being with u. Whenever I feel like I’m in confusion with my feelings whether my decision was right or wrong, u always prove me that I should never go back to u, because u always make me feel like shit. It’s torturing being like this. I don’t hate u and I don’t think I will, but u always disappoint me in every way possible.

Wow

Wow! Just Wow! I don't know what to say. I want to say it all here, but it's too much on me, i have no word....

silent…

he left at a time where i was still deeply in love with him. he silently left me without a word. he left without explaining. all my texts were unanswered and all my calls were never picked up. gosh, it hurts to be ignored. its been 3 long months and i’m still attached to him. no words could describe the damaged my heart felt. i felt betrayed i would’ve never treated him like that. i couldn’t wrap my head around why he left me the way he did. some nights, i would cry because i missed him so much. i can still see his smile , still hear his voice, still feel his warmth and still remember his words… i’m gonna wait and pray that maybe one day he’ll return back to me. i still have hope because i still love him.

What if I am just the girl who comes into his life just to help him be a better man for another girl?

We werent supposed to meet. I was supposed to walk a path set out for me...i was supposed to never step a foot or breathe into your world...but a moment of recklessness brought me into a new world that made me into a happier person. And I met you. You were always like a shadow until one day i stopped, turned around, and fell immediately into your cold, indifferent eyes. You barely talked to anybody, but you were responsive to me. You tolerated my meanness, you listened to my sob stories, and you let me talked abt my drama without making me feel like i am a bother. Slowly, you opened up to me...but I know there is still a deeper part of you I might never get to know. Nevertheless, as friends, you are the best friend a girl could ever asked for. I've never had a male friend, so thank you for making me feel appreciated. Thank you for making me feel safe. Most important of all, thank you for making me realize what it feels like to fall in love with a true gentleman. I know my feelings arent mutual, but that is fine. We are still young. Our dreams are still far. One day, I will look back at us and smile. One day, when I am ready to move on, I will picture you in my head and tell myself, "This is the standard you're aiming for. Do not settle for less." Please...please dont get tired of me. I scolded you, nagged you because i care. I know you have the potential to be a succesful man that is why I do not want you to waste your potential. I want your family and the girl whom you will end up with to be proud of you. Why? Because you deserve the world. I care about you. A lot. I always do and I always will.