Which one?
Works hard or love hard?
There are many men out there in this world Surly I haven’t met all kinds of men yet. I have found my type but I don’t see that type in many men yet. So why am I rushing myself into this? And the only question that keep running in my mind is Why HIM?- yes, I want him and I love him I can see myself that I’m not crazily fall in love with him which I used to but I can’t live without him as well. I hate that’s the person I’m in love right now is him cuz I know we can’t be more than just FRIENDS. From all these months we’ve been messaging, calling, are all caring as friends? Or more than that? YES, we flirted for fun but I can’t believe I’m the one who lost in this game that we both started. It seemed unfair to me, how can he sleep peacefully every single nights without feeling anything while I couldn’t sleep properly because my mind is thinking about him. The happiness feeling which made me feel so loved, special, the smile that I wear on my face while facing my phone’s screen, feeling someone is giving me the best comfort or comfortable hug which I thought it was gone and never comes back suddenly comes into my life. All because of who? - it’s HIM I hate how biggest role play he plays in my life without realizing anything.. like nth until I can’t lost him. I hate how his sweet words and action melt my heart into water. I hate how I am to him like an open book but for me I can’t even read his mind a bit I hate how every songs I’m listening to is always remind me about him. I hate how many articles I have read always related to our situation. I hate when I know we can’t be more than this and how many times I try to stop myself to fall for him but end up losing I hate how today he treated me like I’m a queen then tmr I’m just someone simple to him. Is it because of me? Am I the only one who fall for my own dream? Does he ever feel the way I do too? Is it my fault? Should I make a first move to get the answer or take a step back ? But HE- he’s really the one who I got inspired these days. Never ever I got/ know a man who can give me this positive energy before. They told me to finding a man who keep pushing you and making you improve for better. YES, I found that person, I found him but I can’t have him. I found someone who I’m about to lost in love way not friendship. The smile I have, all good feeling I have is from him but the painful feeling right now, a drop of smile on my face also because of him cuz I can’t feel that feeling anymore [ BABE ] I know we joke around calling each other like this. But I want us to keep calling each other like this as forever. One day someone will come into his life and replace me with this nickname, one day he’ll find his true [ BABE ] and takes care of his heart which I know that isn’t me but sometimes the little hope in my heart still think however I’m still here being happy for him to find somebody new and best for him. I miss him, miss the old vibe we used to be, am I being trapped by my own feelings/ game I have set for myself again? Having crush is ok and fun not until you truly love someone too much and for real. And for me this situation isn’t having a crush this what we called, right person wrong time. Or I can say right person wrong situation. I swear to myself that I won’t end up in this kind of love situation again but look? Why the boys that I fall in this situation always the nice guys. This situation is harder than having a crush on someone and the feeling I have for men in this situation is much much stronger and it just hits different. I still remembered how much time I had to move on from that old person, even after years he’s still the one who I remember and he lives free in my heart. And now look at who coming again. Same way, same feeling but this one is stronger. He actually being the same way as the old person. How he drives me crazy, how much he make me fall in love everyday. Are we gonna end our relationship like I did with that old person? By stop messaging anyone? It’s hurt. There’s only one thing both of them don’t have in common is everyone knows/ sus on me with old person but between me and him no one noticed it yet unless I told people.
Works hard or love hard?
We broke up a while ago, and I knew you with someone new. I knew that you had been in contact with them during our relationship. And, this is the act of cheating. Still, I couldn't bring myself to hate you, and I also took all the blame for myself even though you committed such an act to me. I always give you the benefit of the doubt. I know that you are still in love with me, then why you don't break up with them? Because they are treating you good right now? Oh yeah, you knew their past, they are well known as a cheater. I understand that they haven't done anything to you there is no point in breaking up with them. After knowing that fact, I am always worried about you. What if they did something bad to you? With all your problems are you able to handle the stress? We have been with one another for 2 and a half years, and I mean nothing to you? I always put you over myself. Yes, it is true in our relationship there is up and down. That is called a mature relationship it is not always fun. Dear Third Person, You should know what you had done. Karma is real, you have done that too many people. Your pretentious act will soon be exposed. You know a third person who stole someone else partner won't last long and I hope you understand that. Still many knew about you, yet you still acting the same. You ruined many people. Sheesh, What a person you are... You will receive your Karma.
Why did you leave me like that? How could you start over with her? Do you ever feel de ja vu? Do you feel the guilt? Why did you treat me this way? It wasn’t in our promise. What we had plan why did you do it with someone else? Why do you have to ruin me this way? Idk anything. Idk why you did this to me. But one thing I am sure of is my love for you have never been less than hers.
Said im fine and said i moved on Im only here passing time in his arms
I feel that every single day and I hate it. I hate myself for having that feeling when I'm supposed to feel so grateful for whatever I have right now. People around me are all so successful and smart and everything and I look like a clown by existing everyday. I freaking hate it.
I met my true love at the age of 16. First love didn’t mean that we have to date. I met a lot of people before him but no one make me felt the love like he did. Let’s call him “A”. Me and A never get to date each other but I love him I truely love him. He’s the one who teach me love and I can’t forget about him. A seem to like me at first but then he lose interest in me and I hurt so bad after knowing it but that’s ok. He’s 2 year older than me. A never get out of my mind I miss him so bad. Still have his number saved, remember every detail about him even the way he talk and his voice. As long as he’s happy I can watch him from far away.
I realized that i loved u too much and forgot to kove myself. And now i love myself more than before. Im trying to hard to change myself to be better so I won’t get hurt in the future like u did to me. Anyway i never hate u. Im still loving u. It’s to be honest. I can’t unlove u. And I appreciated everything that u done for me before. U as the second man after my dad to take care me everything abt food, drink, sleep and protect my everytime. Im so thankful cuz i never got a man like u before.
I know we can’t never be more than friends.But I still can’t cut myself off from you.I know you can’t love me as I love you.I know you are a good friend.you are a person.who always listens to all my stories.Always encourage everyone.you are the one who always shares your fun with everyone. And you are the only one I love, you and you are my friend.It’s not wrong to love someone, but it’s wrong to love someone you should not love.Sorry for always bothering you.I will try. Thanks for help me all everything.I wish you. #Dear Phalla