December 2015

There was a guy that catch my eyes back then during my parent working trip at KPS since 2015. Our eyes catch while I was on my way down the stair and it keep bothering me for around one year and thanks god in 2017 I can forget it because I was busy studying for my BACII . I never thought that we could meet again but in 2018 I end up working in the same place with him until now. I use to be someone who good at controlling myself when it comes to feeling and always try to calm myself down for these few years but lately it seem to be out of control and I cannot stop thinking about him. He keep looking at me when we meet and when our eyes meet my heart keep racing. I always trying to avoid but the more I try the more we accidentally meet. I just don't know what to do now...it's so confusing.....

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

Congratulations

Warmest congratulations on your graduation and best wishes for your next life chapter. I've thought of things I could do for your day, but then I realized it will only cause you more trouble. I don't want to bother you again. It's just sad that I wont be there with you on any days anymore. Take good care of yourself, eat your meals, and stop drinking too much coffee and alcohol. Stop doubting yourself over things, you should know how much I'm proud of you. I know you will be doing great without me, you always do, and I'm happy for you, I mean it.

2025-08-14

លើសពីមិត្ត

បានត្រឹមតែជាមិត្តភក្តិ រយៈពេល៦ឆ្នាំ
2025-08-14

Wrong love

I know we both are girls but I don’t know why I fall in love with you and always fell harder every time I see your smile your laugh . Thinking about it’s again I know it’s only me the one who fell and even harder.

2025-08-14

To the person I loved the most.

Hi! Yeah it's weird when I have to express this feeling, but it's kinda worse if I don't speak it out and keep it in my head a little longer. I know it's only 3 or 4 months that we've known each other, and it even started from a complete stranger who have connection only on social media. However, the feeling I had for you were real. I really wish that it could work out for us, or maybe we could do better than this, or at least we have a better ending. I regret for the action I did without the consideration of your feeling, I really do. Until these day I still feel sorry for doing those dumb things. I chatted to you because I miss you, I care for you, I don't want bad stuff to happen to the person I care so much about; but it broke me to pieces when you told me that you're dating someone now. I'm happy to see you smile, really. I'm happy for you that you're with a better person who will provide what you want and what you need. But at the same time, I was sitting in the corner of room thinking about you all day. I couldn't focus on my working and studying. Everything were bad for me, it left the scar on my heart. Yet, I still have the urge to look at our old conversation. Just to find out and tell myself that I have lost the person I love the most to a stupid mistake, and there's no way I can reverse or go back in time to erase what I had done but to accept the truth that you're gone. One last thing, it's close to your birthday and I still have the gift that I bought for you months ago. I hope I can give it to you, but I don't wanna make you feel uncomfortable seeing me. On top of that, I don't wanna be a conflict between you and your partner. Goodluck with your new journey, and yeah last long.

2025-08-14

ស្នេហាតែម្ខាង

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2025-08-14

Heartbreak is a karma (Admin edition)

Yeah well admin is also using this page because stuff be that messed up sometimes. Religiously speaking, you do good, you get good. You do bad, you get bad. And that's karma. I'm not that religious myself but some theories do stay. When I do good, I don't expect anything back. But when I know I did something bad, I always expected that it will happen back to me one day. Right now, I don't know, I feel empty, I feel heartbrokened. Yeah allowing myself to feel those things, I put myself at fault, only I am to blame. But like the title says: Heartbreak's a karma. I'm not pretty, I dont have much admirers in high school so I'm not used to people liking me. So when I encounter someone who does, I used to just accept their love and learn to love them afterwards because I guess that is what happens when you are desperate. But now I dont do that anymore, I meet so much people nowadays so high school was a small world, a small sea with a few fish. I raised my standards, I told myself to only get in a relationship if i genuinely get attached when we were talking, I need to like someone before getting into a relationship. I wont ever get into a relationship and then learn to like them afterwards, never again. Unexpectedly I found that someone. I raised my standards and I raised my guards but in the end I still caught feelings alone. Again, I'm not pretty. But people confessed, people tried flirting. They were good people, they put in so much efforts yet I already liked someone else so rejection was the only way out; I tried ignoring the texts, replied the texts after a long time, and with all these indirect rejections, sometimes I still had to come down to a direct one where I said no. Being rejected hurts, I know it hurts because I've been through it too so I dont like rejecting people; I dont want to hurt you because I know what it's like to be hurt. So please, dont fall for me, dont try to love me, dont like me more than a friend. Every heartbreak, every sorrow Im feeling, I blame myself, I blame myself because i did that to you too, and the pain found its way back. Besides of the guilt of rejecting people, I'm hard to love, I'm incapable of being happy, there are so much more people out there who deserve your love, your efforts, but not me. Furthermore, when I like someone, I do it with all my heart and that's not something that is easy to pull out from so you're probably too late regarding the speed of how fast I fall for someone. My life, my emotions, how I function are so messed up like that. I wouldn't want you to be messed up trying to adapt with me.

2025-08-14

តើនេះជានិស្ស័យ រឺក៏ជាការគិតងែម្ខាងរបស់ខ្ញុំ?

ខ្ញុំបានទៅហាងកាហ្វេមួយកន្លែងនៅក្រុងភ្នំពេញចំនួនបួនដង ហើយបានជួបនារីម្នាក់ទាំងបួនដង។ ពេលដែលពួកយើងឃើញគ្នាគឺពួកយើងតែងតែសម្លឹងមើលមុខគ្នាគ្រប់ពេល ថ្ងៃមួយខ្ញុំក៏មានឪកាសអង្គុយតុក្បែរគាត់ ខ្ញុំតែងតែលួចសម្លឹងមើលមុខគាត់រហូត ដល់ពេលមួយគាត់ក៏បានសួរខ្ញុំថា បងមានម៉ាសសល់មួយទៀតទេ ខ្ញុំក៏បានឆ្លើយថា អត់មានទេ។ ហើយគាត់បាននិយាយថាចឹងចាំគាត់ដើរទៅរកនៅក្រៅហាង តែខ្ញុំឃើញគាត់អត់មានម៉ាស ខ្ញុំក៏បានប្រាប់គាត់ថាចាំខ្ញុំទៅរកអោយហើយគាត់ក៏ព្រម ពេលដែលខ្ញុំរកបានហើយក៏ខ្ញុំយកអោយគាត់ គាត់ក៏អរគុណខ្ញុំ។ ហើយពួកយើងក៏មកផ្ទះរៀងៗខ្លួនទៅ។ តើនេះជានិស្ស័យ រឺក៏ជាអ្វីទើបខ្ញុំនៅតែនឹកឃើញរឿងនេះក្នុងចិត្តខ្ញុំរហូត?
2025-08-14

Why mom?

Why mom? Why do you have to make me feel this way? What have I ever done so wrong? You know, it is very hurtful and very tormenting when you, my mother, care so little of me. Why is it that when my younger brother got a minor cold, you would rush me to buy him medicine, to take care of him, and so on, but when I got tested positive of covid-19 because I have to go to work, you didn't even seem to care about it as a matter a fact, you didn't even want to buy me covid med, you told me I don't need covid med and just take normal coughing med, you thought paracetamol is enough? Just why do I have to feel all this unfairness? Should I just do you and everyone a favor and just take as much paracetamol as I can and just die? Would that have been better for everyone?