Old me VS New me
It hurts right? Turning from the happy, joyful and socialize person to the one who try to hide and isolate himself from everyone. I kept having mental breakdown when Iβm alone in the dark room. Hope it gets better soon.
We were in love, but in the end, we were just a beautiful chapter in each other's lives. Have you ever felt like you could never truly let someone go? Because it was actually so special, you'll always have a piece of them with you. Every memory, every laugh, and even the terrible moments are preserved. It's now as much a part of you as your job. Letting go of them is more akin to realizing that the book series you've been reading won't have the happy finish you'd hoped for. How could they leave the series unfinished? What about all the anticipation? What are character arcs? What is the story's central theme? Well, the writers are no longer together, therefore that's the end of it. Then. The years pass, and before you know it, the writers are back to finish what they started. You love them, but you understand that they must do what their heart and mind desire. And who knows, maybe they'll find their way back home, and we'll be lucky enough to be considered home. You let them go, realizing that no matter how many times you reread the previous book the authors wrote, the next page is blank. Every now and then, there are whispers and small droplets of story and detail. A foreshadowing of a heartbreaking story. Only when everything comes together perfectly does that story get the happy ending it deserves. When two people are separated, anything can happen. Someone meets someone new, people make incompatible life decisions, or people simply grow apart. Accepting reality for what it is is what letting go entails. Two people who do not want to give up their entire outlook and foundations in life for the sake of the other, because doing so would mean a slow and painful death for them both in terms of mental capacity. One day, the time will be right. All the love, C
It hurts right? Turning from the happy, joyful and socialize person to the one who try to hide and isolate himself from everyone. I kept having mental breakdown when Iβm alone in the dark room. Hope it gets better soon.
Is spending time with me exhausting? What? You said it's because you tired from work, that's why you act like this? I mean you know, I'm super busy at work and I'm really burnt out too. But still, I carved out time to spend it with you, and I want our time together to be special, you know! and I bring you here because I wanted us to reconnect, and... do you seriously think I came here to just shop? I want us talking and walking together... but you always want to go eat~ is it because you're hungry or are you just trying to kill time? You don't want to do anything with me anymore, do you? π https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6qdzjTSgH0
I fought for you and I waitedβ¦ I thought I could fix you. I chose you, again and againβ¦. but you chose to be an immature man who refuse to communicate and be responsible for your own life. There is no commitment now. Be free. I will move on and love like Iβve never been hurt. I deserve better and I will grow to be a better person. You can go live and sort yourself out. Because this time, I choose to fight for my own happiness. The next man deserves the best of me, not what you put me through.
Being insecure is not a valid reason to leave the other person. Itβs too cruel, disrespect, disregard the love and the commitment the other person has for you and only you.
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I know you're rushing to get to that next phase in your life. You're sick and tired of being where you're at and feel like you should be somewhere else doing greater things. You're stressing yourself to have more. Your giving yourself anxiety tricking yourself that you're behind. Listen to me, you're exactly where you should be at. You're where you're at because there's a few more lessons you have to learn before you go into that next phase. But I'll tell you this, as long as you're moving, you're not stuck. As long as you keep working you're not stagnant. Be okay with taking steps and not running. You'll have experiences where you're running. This stage isn't that. Life is making you walk because you have a lot to learn in this moment in time and you need more time to gather all this information. Sometimes life doesn't give us what we're asking for because we're not ready to have them. We're not ready for the responsibilities. We're not ready for the stress. We're not ready or responsible enough to manage that many things. That's why life gives us a little at a time so we can learn how to mange blessings. Life is giving us time to develop before it unloads everything we deserve. It takes experience and wisdom to have a lot. Be grateful for the little you have so you'll be grateful for everything you'll be receiving in the future.
Why I said it is green flag but actually it is a red flag? Yes, we both can see it is as green flag when we both call every night and itβs kinda understanding and sweet at first three months. The day I started talking to you, the chemistry feels so right, and a clicking. My brain started to pumping a serotonin and dopamine. But, I may click the wrong tap, not that you treated me wrong, yet you love me more than yourself. Itβs real attachment and attention that you donβt want to untie. Itβs red flag because you donβt love yourself enough. You love me too much that you upon your whole happiness on me. You get jealous easily. You wish me to be your shooting star all the time. Yes, Iβm not perfect, I made mistake that I ignore you sometime and want my space a lots. You are overthinking what if chat to other guy? While Iβm not. Itβs unfair that we are happy together, but you are hiding those sad moment in your life alone. I love you and I want to know whatβs going on too. Itβs so hard for us to leave each other while we both still love each other. I hope this break up taught you to love yourself enough to discover the sun within yourself and shine in kaleidoscope ways, so you donβt need othersβ dimly light to guide you. As, you finally can firmly stand on the ground and feel happy again. Iβm always grateful that you were part of my life. Thank you for your pure love and understanding. Hope we meet again when you are able to love yourself more. I still love you, and wait for you.
I will wait for you until youβre finally ready for a relationship again, but donβt make me wait for too long.