The villain is me

There have been countless times where I've made you feel all of those disgusting feelings knowing full well how much you loved me knowing how much I hated these but I couldn't bring myself to change so suddenly. So i gave up our connection even though I still loved you dearly. Maybe that's why it pained me to see you being all hurtful and anxious because of my thoughtless actions, the thought that only me matters in our relationship. I've pictured us in a family of many pets, pictured you being the best dad and the best husband a man could ever be. That at some point i was unable to picture my life without you. But gradually, I've realized my behaviors started to hurt you, my actions began to make you doubt my love for you, we kept misinterpreting and misunderstanding each other. I tried my best to be optimistic about the situation despite being the over emotional and dramatic person i am. I have thought that with love, we could overcome everything but i was naive. I forgot that love is just the topping to the already flourishing relationship. We couldn't take each other's words to heart, you have a complete different opinion and view and so do I. So how can we expect each of us to understand each other? I've resisted the urge to approach you multiple times already since we broke up, I've cried thinking about you, i just wanted to scream loudly so the whole world know i miss you. I've missed you but I'd rather pick your happiness over this. I'll still hold the belief that you'll find someone who can shoulder all the burdens you're carrying, always be the ear to listen to your thoughts, always have the heart to open to your everything. I'll pray for you. I didn't want to make this long, but it's already long. So I wanna close this with .... I love you. Sorry that your last person couldn't be me. I will forever cherish the memories we had. Please stay safe and healthy. From that girl who let you go away.

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

Slowly, you started pushing me away.

You know what happens to the person who you are pushing away? They’re starting to question themselves, their worth and feels so insignificant and powerless. I, myself questioned myself “ am I not good enough “. You know how much it hurts when I tried my best to stood by you while you’re pushing me away? Is it fun to doing so? I wanted to feel needed again. I wanted you to want me like you had before. I wanted you to lean on me, but that was the impossible task for you. Despite feeling so distant from you, I was there every time you needed to talk. We went from telling each other anything and everything to complete strangers. I feel like I don’t even know you anymore. I'd been pushed so deeply that there was no coming back. We went from the funny, the goofy texts to nothing at all. I’ll never stop caring. But if you decide to push me away, I’ll stay away. You pushed me too far, too fast and I couldn’t keep chasing after you.

2025-08-14

Ex's Lover

So how do you describe your current lover who still screenshot their ex's recent photos? what if the feelings are still there or was it just my stupid imagination? lmao, isn't it funny they keep on telling you they love you, but still do things like this? i mean do you really love me or just for fun or just to forget your ex who has a better body, face than me?

2025-08-14

My impossible crush

It sounds stupid of me but I still want to share it. First of all, i dint know that he had a gf, and I dint mean to like him as well. But he always tried to be close to me. I didn’t know when I started to like him. From day to day, I liked him more and more. One day I got to know that he already had a gf. Yeahh!!! I was shocked when I first heard. Yet, I couldn’t stop this feeling even I know it’s a Kama to love s.one else’s bf. You know, he acted like my bf. Always called me even he had nothing to say, made a video call to show me what he was doing, teased me, helped me with a little thing and etc…He even showed me of his younger pictures and his family members. At that time, I felt like I was in a relationship. I knew that it was impossible to go further but you know I just went with the flow even I knew it would hurt me but I still wanted it. I admit that I was selfish cuz sometimes I also wanted him and his gf break up and I always thought he would choose me over his gf. Unfortunately, he disappeared without noticed. Since then, we had no longer contacted to each other for almost two years now. Since we hadn’t followed each other on social media, so now I don’t know anything about him. If this message is happened on his new feed, I hope he would notice it. And I want to confess my feeling for him right now that I still have feeling for you but I don’t expect anything from you. I just want to show my feeling. That’s all from me. And lastly, I just wonder did u have any feeling for me a little bit?
2025-08-14

🥑

Sometimes, happiness is only a cloak to hide one sorrow.

2025-08-14

I don't want to give up.

I am depressed, insecurities filled my mind, anxiety consumed my daily life. I am filled with hate and resentment towards myself. I want to be happy but I just can't seem to be, I put on a fake smile in front of everybody but I am getting very exhausted doing so. I want to keep going but I feel like I am on the edge of the cliff and I am about to jump...! I cried for help but my family didn't seem to care, not many people seem to care, am I worthless? What is my purpose in life? Why am I here? Somebody help me!
2025-08-14

Farewell..

Hey it's been almost two months since we broke up, I still remembered you left me on 4th Sep with a short meaningless message "I want to be alone" without any explaination without a closure you just left me there in the dark wondering what did i do wrong but now that you seems happier i guess i was the problem. I wonder what went wrong i wonder if we give up too early or if i held on for too long? I never thought goodbye would be so hard. I'm writing this because i'm going to let go of us of you..life been awfully hard on me these days. My family my work nothing really works out for me i miss venting out to you about my problems yes i miss you i still do but its not that i want us back i'm glad that you are doing well on your own. it's sad because what i felt for you was really special and now i have to let go of everything as much as i hate giving up but i have to this time because i can't keep torturing myself like that, I stayed up all night crying i woke up in the morning crying i barely even touch food i didn't even go out and meet my friend all i did was getting drunk every nights so i can fall asleep,i keep doing things that i don't enjoy doing like active on the social media adding story publicly so you could see you know me better than anyone i aint the type to do that i ususally really private about my life it's getting tiring..this getting too long i'm gonna make it short..Take care T, you're a good person thanks you for the time we spent together, the calls the texts the late night conversations. i hope that you're happy with the way your life is right now i wish only the best for you ..Goodbye.
2025-08-14

Skinny Bullet.

It's hard to find someone with the same energy, And When I did I cant have it. I know I Aint best or maybe not the one u looking for but my love be real AF and I be trying.

2025-08-14

....!!!!

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