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Please approve cf title: what if?
We left your house around 5pm. The sky started to rain. It's our first time riding a motorbike in the rain together. I wore your white hoodie hugging you from behind under the heavy rain. It was one of the best feelings ever. I would get emotional while staying under the rain but staying with you made me forget all those traumas. “I love you” you said it under the rain. I love it. I wish this moment would last longer. We went on Spotify and listened to heavy metal music because it's your fav genre but I skipped rock music. It was Bad Romance by Lady Gaga. We sang along. The next song was Good 4 U by Olivia Rodrigo. These two are my favorites. Little did I know, my story became exactly like my favorite songs. You gave up on me. I don't wanna lose you, never.
Please approve cf title: what if?
I never relate to anything as much as this drama. It's literally the story of us except they could meet again after 5 years while we couldn't even after more than 5 years.Ung's character is pretty much similar to yours and he reminds me so much of you. It pains me to see him suffered from the breakup and how it changed his life as I realize you had suffered this much too after I coldly left you. Watching Ung feels as if I'm watching you and it hits me hard. I wonder if you're doing better now; and whether or not you still overthink and having trouble sleeping.I wonder if you hate me as much that you could have thrown salt and sprayed water at me if we met. Even if our path will never be crossed again, I'll still be happy for your happiness. I hope you never doubt yourself again, just live well and be happy.
Why am I the problem? Even if your know how they treated me? If I’m always the problems, there’s no reason to stay alive.
Normal ppl don't know what it feels like to wake up everyday and wish I'm not alive. I hate waking up, I hate living, I hate being sad everyday. I'm tired of trying, sick of crying. I know I've been smiling, but inside I'm dying. Behind my smile is a hurting heart, behind my laugh I'm falling apart. Look closely at me and you'll see, the girl I am, it isn't me. I hate seeing everything blooming around me while I'm here still withering into nothingness, I feel like I'm already dead so what difference would it make. Sometimes I just wish I was dead, I wouldn't have to wake up everyday with regret. I wouldn't have to hate myself more than I already do. But most importantly I wouldn't have to feel pain anymore. I'm hiding what I'm feeling but I'm tired of holding this inside my head. I'm not feeling anything, I'm completely empty right now, it's making me depressed. When you're depressed you don't control your thoughts, your thoughts control you. I wish some ppl would understand this, especially my parent. Every thought is a battle, every breath is a war, and I don't think I'm winning anymore. I'm sorry for being like this. I'm sorry for being such a failure.
I might say that this was a love at first sight for me since I first saw her I fell in love with her eyes and everything about her. Staying and chatting with her feel so right. Is it just me feeling this way about her? I would skip everything just to wait for her although we have only a little time to spend with each other. I am not so sure about myself if I could be a good or the right one for her, but I would still love to stay by her side and do everything just to make her happy. I was actually telling her how I feel by putting it into jokes. was it a good idea to do it? To be honest, this time I wanna ask her to be my GF, but I couldn't do it. I have no courage to do so. Why? because I'm scared of getting rejected that she might not feel the same way like I did.
Let me tell you a story of how a rejection has given a really great plan for business. On Oct 31st, I confessed to my Leo crush using a tik tok video which somehow made him guilty of trying to come up with a rejection. Actually no I didn’t try to confess. I was just guilt tripping him cuz cmon I’ve been saying I liked him for several times. Later that night, we called and talked about it. I told him that I actually lost feelings long ago and what I did was just guilt tripping you for rejecting me duhh. Later later that night, a brilliant plan came to mind since you know I will be doing my business plan for final and stuff. Guess what came to my mind!!!!! A Dating App 😭😭 Not your typical dating app like Tinder. Trust me it’s good 🥳😉 Lady and Gentlemen, let me introduce you to Syncnetic. A dating app that allows you to find your compatible partner through your personality trait and your zodiac sign. Beside these, you get to rent-a-partner 🌚 I found rent-a-partner really trendy in China and Japan. So why not Cambodia Lahhhhhh 😂😂 Go Get Syncnetic now!!!! Syncnetic. “Together like magnet” 😉 And that is how rejection helps me come up with stupid sh*t 🌚🌚🌚🌚
I saw you usually react and read all of the confess in this page so, I hope you see this. I've been waiting for you for a long time without getting any messages from you. What do you think about me? Do you want me to waiting for you or want me to move on? Please let me know dear. I'm stuck. I want you to know that I love, I don't want to lose you. I can waiting for you if you ask me to wait.. but if you want me to move on, That's okay I can accept it. ☺️
Wherever you are, you will continue to shine like gold in my memories.