Online Crush

I crush on someone who I met in online app. At first he add friend to me. In

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

How many time?

How many time do i have to say sorry? I don’t know why I’m the one who said sorry every time my ex texted me. What did i do wrong? Did i cheat like he did? No. But why do I have to keep saying sorry? Is it because i break up with him while he’s cheating behind my back? Do I have to say sorry every fucking time he send me a text that’s he misses me? Please stop haunting me. Im scared, fr. I’m wrong for breaking one’s heart, but who’s responsible for my heartbreak? No one. Please stop i’m begging. I always want my ex to be my friend, no matter how we end it. I still love them as a friend but this guy haunt me like a ghost that I don’t want to mention that I’ve ever been with him. The aftermath is a mess💀

2025-08-14

Toxic

My mental health is breaking down so is my mind. The cheerful me have gone and I wish I could have someone who stay by my side and tell me “Everything will be fine.” :)

2025-08-14

your presence

it's so weird to no longer have someone in your life. whether it's a friend you don't talk to anymore or a partner you've broken up with, it's so weird to be left with all of this knowledge of someone else and have no use for it anymore. like the way they drink their coffee, their favorite meal when they're sad, a story they told you abt their childhood when you both saw something that reminded them of said story so now you're reminded of it too when you see that thing. and to have someone out in the world with so much intimate and casual knowledge of you and you wonder if they feel happy or sad or uncaring when they see something that reminds them of you too.

2025-08-14

Don't lose yourself.

Sometimes you really love a person eventho they have done bad things to you and Sometimes you've been holding on to it for so long that you forgot yourself. That you've lost the value of your worth, I know it struggling sometimes to hold on to something that you are trying so hard, But if it hurts you, you also have to let it go. There's no point of holding on to it, it will only eat you up and keep you insecure. I am a guy who's badly devastated by a few person who did the same thing to me over and over. I'm the one who is trying to hard to keep things like before, eventho i know so damn well that it's not gonna work out for both of us. Coming home from work getting to talk to your favorite person, yet that person doesn't seem to care at all, cold replies, short text, late replies. I kept convincing myself that it's probably just one of her bad day. But that's when i realized that bad days doesn't goes on for 4 months straight. I tried talking about it, one week, ONE WEEK, everything is back to square one, cold replies, short text, late replies. That's when i started asking myself "What am i holding on for?", "Was it love?", "Was it that i've stayed with that person for so long that i can't live without them?", "Was it the time we spent together that i don't wanna let it all goes to waste?", "Was it to the point that staying with that person is apart of my habit?". Those are all the questions that keeps popping in my head. I've lost pieces of myself staying with that person without realizing it until it was too late for me and now I'm lost, i couldn't find myself anymore. I've lost myself trying to be with you.

2025-08-14

i wish i could only be poor to the point i can handle it.

: )

2025-08-14

Regret

I lost my virgin at the age 21 years old. Do u think it is so fast? And How do all of u guys think of me? ភ្លើតភ្លើន? សប្បាយភ្លេចខ្លួន? ខុសប្រពៃណី?I lost it to my bf and he never think about future with me. Emmmm! Now I feel like I dont want anyone anymore beside building myself to be strong and I am sorry for my family that I am not a good daughter! Really sorry.

2025-08-14

silent…

he left at a time where i was still deeply in love with him. he silently left me without a word. he left without explaining. all my texts were unanswered and all my calls were never picked up. gosh, it hurts to be ignored. its been 3 long months and i’m still attached to him. no words could describe the damaged my heart felt. i felt betrayed i would’ve never treated him like that. i couldn’t wrap my head around why he left me the way he did. some nights, i would cry because i missed him so much. i can still see his smile , still hear his voice, still feel his warmth and still remember his words… i’m gonna wait and pray that maybe one day he’ll return back to me. i still have hope because i still love him.

2025-08-14

All the clouds in me are raining

I’ve been questioning my life lately and I try freaking hard to become the best version of myself everyday. Living away from home without having my parents by my side is something I’ve never done before and I admit that my life has changed so much since the day I left home. I’m constantly teary knowing how much they worry about me. They are the ONLY reason why I keep going and still living this freaking life. If it weren’t for them, my existence wouldn’t have existed until now. I admit that I appreciate where I am now. I truly am! But at some points, I feel like the life I’m living is currently draining me day by day. I cannot see the purpose of life and it stressed me out whenever I think of the word ‘future’. It’s so dark and I cannot see anything. My anxiety keeps telling me the worst scenarios because I know that I cannot be the one everyone expects me to be. I might look normal but deep down inside I’m just a sad soul. No one knows how hard it is for me to survive each day. Having anxiety and insecurities about everything. Being a professional overthinker who worry even at a little thing and always wake up tired from a vivid dream… I don’t want to live like this but it’s not like I have a choice. The more I grow up, the more I start questioning my life and wondering why I live like this. I’m turning 19 next month and my only wish is that I can survive til I’m 20… -J