Suicide!

This isn't really a confession about anything, but more like an announcement. I don't know if I will be able to continue this thing we called living any longer. I guess it like I'm running away but I don't think I can keep doing this so when I hit my 20th birthday, I think I'm going to kill myself. I think it gonna be the right thing to do because I'm pretty worthless and my life meant nothing so yea. Cheer to the next 2 months of my life.

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

Another lost battle

I build a dream to be free, to write my own story, to dominate my destiny. I lose my sleep fighting for victory, gather my energy to outrun difficulty. But fate has never favored me and luck has never served me. I know my tears and dedication and the struggle to reach my passion. But my ambition and expectation crush down to disappointment. Now I'm all broken. In dark moment, I'm getting away from the sky like I never ever gonna fly again. Will I discover my light and light up my dark night? Will all my trial someday win over all the fight? Maybe someday, I will reach the peak and claim my championship. Cus with new hope, my faith in me is reignited.
2025-08-14

Emji Kay Jr.

A fictional character, who was inspired by a stupid kid with zero commitment. And now, that character is having some mental crisis. The problem is that she’s been doubting her life decisions and kinda want to end every sh*t including her own L… And as a writer, shall I just finish her or let her live fearing those uncertainty?

2025-08-14

Too sensitive and weak

I hate how I'm too soft and emotionally weak. I cry over things that normal people would just brush off and move on. Little things can make me feel down and once I'm down, I don't really know how to pick myself up. When I see something that hurts my feelings, I would think about it for several months. I've been spending way too long trying to move on from someone I've only known for a short period of time and doesn't even care about me. If the person happens to know about my feelings, they probably find me stupid and pathetic. It's also difficult for me to share these things with my friends because they would find me overly emotional because even I myself think so. But I just can't help it. Is there even a way to improve myself to be mentally strong like others? Cos I really admire those who can just brush things off and let go of things easily. I can't keep on being this way when I've entered adulthood for quite a few years already.
2025-08-14

Should I leave?

I read #KJ0470, and I kinda feel related. Yes, from the first time I know her and her past, I always want to treat her better. I want to make her feel luck in her life. I want to make her feel loved, because she deserves all the love. But lately, I feel bad about myself. I made mistake, I made her cry and disappointed. I feel like I can't be the one for her, I'm not good enough to take care of her. At least once a day, I think about breaking up so she can find someone better. But If I leave her while she's still in love with me, I will be the one who hurt her, just again like all her exes. I don't want to be the one who hurt her, but I also don't want to stuck her door, because deep inside I know I'm so incapable, too bad to deserve her love. I do need your advice.
2025-08-14

Walked away day

Again, thanks for coming back to me and stay until our anniversary day.. I knew i am stupid to say this alone, I always remember everything of us, and i always wanted us to get back again.. But it’s never worth it, you are not in love with me anymore and you had a someone better than me , hope he can treat you better and give you whatever you want… So what i have to do , i let you go, and please don’t even look back as a friend or still remember what I have done with you! I will never bothering you again.. so hope you are doing great, always meet up with someone better as you wish. Don't worry, no one will mess your life up again, no one will ask you to stay again.. You can choose him and start over with him.. Thanks for came back again to completed our 2-years day! Saturday, 25 Sep 21 Walked away day!

2025-08-14

Will You?

If it were you, will you go to help ur ex if she/he ask you for a help even she/he alr had someone else ?
2025-08-14

Subtly losing her

I can’t do it anymore. I have to admit it. I can never get her out of my heart. I’ve tried and tried and the harder I try to, the bigger hold I discover in my heart. She has a hold on my heart that I could not break if I wanted to and there has been countless of times that I wanted to. It has been overwhelming, drowning, suffocating and even deadly painful at times but I could not stop loving her anymore than I could stop breathing. I am hopelessly, irretrievably, subconsciously in love with her. More than she and I would know. I start losing her subtly, but the pain I feel is enormous. I can’t lose her. I really can’t.

2025-08-14

Always be you

I never regret choosing you so please don’t worry about me leaving you. I hope you know and realize your worth cause you’ll always be my first choice.