Words

What am I to you?

I've been trying so hard these few months to win your heart but I feel so tired now. Someday you make me feel like you wanted me and another day u act like I'm nothing to you. Yeah I've changed a lot for you. From a girl who easily get mad to be a calm one because you never give a fu*ck about my feelings. You never care if I'm okay or not. What u said to me always so mean and I used to cry every night about that but still choose to forgive and text to you first in the next morning. You said you don't want to lose me but why I see no efforts at all to me ?. I don't mind to be just friend to you as long as you care about me but you seem not. I will not be able to move on now but I just wanted to remind you that maybe one day I can finally walk away because the patient is always under limited. I tried my best to keep you since the first day until now but if you still act like this sorry maybe I have to lose you to find me. Dear my little star! From me @your bestie 😊

2025-08-14

Some of my point of view in these past few years for hiding from the reality.

Dope I am a kind of person that would build the walls instead of the bridge because I used to experience some trauma events in the past. [newLine*] [newLine*] They used to call me “ sensitive, dramatic, self victimized, stupid, etc.” And here I am, being a cold hearted person ever in my life. I don’t like the version of today’s me yet, I am still glad that it kinda makes me stronger and be more careful around my surroundings. Running away from my own feelings is one of my coping mechanisms since it is the best way to do so when it comes to expressing emotions. I wanted to open up and have the healthiest relationship with others but the dark inner part of me is still keep telling me that they will judge me in every possible way that they could also the people that I expect then to be will be leave me eventually anyway so instead of being my real self, I just show them what they wanted to see from me.[newLine*] [newLine*] Losing the ones that I love is also a tragic cause for my mental health too. My mom passed away since I was 6 years old and I hadn’t had the mother-daughter moments yet and it really broke my heart ‘til nowadays. So instead of crying, I usually hide my true emotions and keep moving forward when I was still not healed from what broke me in the past. I used to held grudges, always get jealous when they got what I wanted, they have the best relationship with their families, they have a strong self confidence and many more. Very toxic person I could possibly find. [newLine*] [newLine*] But here I am, after all what I have been through both mentally and physically. A cold hearted b*tch also I am still keep finding out who I really am and what is my purpose of life. I still feel guilty when I hurt the ones that love me so, but nothing is permanent anyway so I’ll live the best of my life instead of pleasing other people. [newLine*] [newLine*]From, thyka. ♡︎

Single?..

Isn't it really hard to find and choose a right person? I find it so difficult to being in a healthy relationship. Going from one to another, make it look like i had lots of partner and សាវា so i choose to stay single. Treating myself love, care and attention which no one can give me. I find peace♡

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