Always You!

To you my priority, since the day you left, I’m certain that I’m not the same person as I used to be. I’m sure that my feeling right now isn’t okay and it hurts me the most. I wanted to let you know that, you’re the only one who made me know what love is, you’re the only one who made me feel warm and secure while I was with you, you’re the only one that my love for you is still the same since our first day until now, you’re the only one whom I have any plans for the future. All of the sacrifices, efforts, and times that I put in, I didn’t expect anything in return, other than your love and dedication. I did everything just to make you feel that you’re the only one that got all of those things from me, not everyone else. I did everything just to make you feel happy, warm, and comfortable. I’ve never stopped daydreaming about how I’m going to build my life, buy my first house, first car with you, and marry you one day. You know what? I see you every two weeks, and when I return home I feel as if I've lost something that no one or nothing can replace. I had the feeling that I was leaving something behind that would never come back. I miss you, I'm upset, I didn’t want to return home, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. You’re the only one, when I’m having fun and all I could think of is what if you were right here with me? I’d go on trips and while living in the moment, I allowed my imaginations to get ahead of me and I was able to picture you beside me and I got that feeling of “how nice would it be for you to be here with me”. To me, you’re perfect. To me, you’re beautiful as always in my eyes. I’m grateful you came into my life, I’m grateful for everything you’ve done for me. My love for you hasn't changed, and no one can take your place in my heart, my mind, and my brain. And I’m so sorry for what I’ve done to you. Sorry that I can’t keep you by my side. I’m still hoping everyday that you will come back to me again. You’re special to me. I’m so proud to have you in my life. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Your photo is still in my wallet, and your picture is still on my lock screen wallpaper. I wrote these letters with a song that I used to sing for you, When you’re home - Tyler Shaw. It’s 3AM now and I’m still thinking about you. I hope you will come back to me! #NL

Feeling bottled up?

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2025-08-14

Stranger again…

Typing on your keyboard while working, you were so focused. You are the type of guy that does not talk unless there is something important to be talked about, which was why we rarely talked until there was something either you or I needed help of. Later, everything changed because one thing led to another and we became so close. We started to share our daily lives activities, and you always found something that we both enjoyed talking to one another. It got to the point that it was very difficult to go through a day without talking to you. It had become a habit of ours to have daily conversation about this and that. No one knew that we were that close since we were so good at hiding it from others, but I knew that deep down in my heart, I already fell for you. You were a guy who did everything I look for in a boyfriend. You made me felt like that there were still nice guys in this world even though we were just friends. Every morning when I woke up, I was always excited to start my day as I would be able to see your face. I could not help but kept looking at you from time to time, and sometimes I caught you did the same to me too. One day, you confessed that you had feeling for me and wished that we could be more than just friends. You just made a girl very happy. I could not stop smiling seeing that message of yours. My heart was pumping hard and my hands were shaking. However, I did not know how to reply besides saying ‘I am sorry but it is not possible’. The feeling of wanting it so much but could not get it was like having a knife stabbed in my chest. We both knew why it could never happen. You gave it a try hoping that I would say yes but I could never do it knowing that it could hurt someone. A part of me wish that you never said those words so that we could keep pretending that we did not have feeling for each other and still could communicate with one another as usual. We were like characters in a novel who could never have a happy ending together. A chapter of my life with you in it was the best and at the same time the most painful. We met, we talked, we became close, and then we became strangers again. It was like nothing had ever happened between us.

2025-08-14

M

called mom and told her I‘ve been struggling with my mental health And she called me weak
2025-08-14

What am I to you?

I've been trying so hard these few months to win your heart but I feel so tired now. Someday you make me feel like you wanted me and another day u act like I'm nothing to you. Yeah I've changed a lot for you. From a girl who easily get mad to be a calm one because you never give a fu*ck about my feelings. You never care if I'm okay or not. What u said to me always so mean and I used to cry every night about that but still choose to forgive and text to you first in the next morning. You said you don't want to lose me but why I see no efforts at all to me ?. I don't mind to be just friend to you as long as you care about me but you seem not. I will not be able to move on now but I just wanted to remind you that maybe one day I can finally walk away because the patient is always under limited. I tried my best to keep you since the first day until now but if you still act like this sorry maybe I have to lose you to find me. Dear my little star! From me @your bestie 😊
2025-08-14

Mr. Perfectly fine ( Taylor swift )

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My love is like sea and lake don't mix

So I started high school, and for the first year I felt like a total outsider. But then I met some amazing people who made me happier than I had ever been. We all became super tight in that first year, and I managed to win over one of them to the point where she fell for me. But here's the thing: I'm gay. I didn't want to fake anything, so I had to end it. It was done in two weeks, and both of us were hurt. I know it's not as tragic as some of the other stories out there, and she has definitely moved on by now, but what kills me is that I lost one of my best friends. It was tough because we were part of a big group of friends, so we kept seeing each other throughout the rest of high school. To make it even more complicated, our moms became besties. And every time we saw each other, there was this awkward invisible wall between us. I acted like I didn't care, and she didn't seem to either, but for some reason I just can't let go. Even though I'm gay, I still think I could have been in love with her. In fact, I think I still am. We crossed paths again at a New Year's party. We exchanged a few meaningless words at the start, but even after we got pretty drunk, nothing happened. I keep having dreams about her since then, where we're friends again and we're just hanging out with other people. It's such a warm and comforting feeling. But I know it's something that I won't ever get to experience again for real.
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Right person But not the right time

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08/March/2022

Just found out I failed on every contest that I applied for. Kinda sad sad but not sad at all. Bye 👋

2025-08-14

365 days of your absence.

I’m the owner of #KJ0010 To my best friend who passed away way too young, I have a thing to tell you that I’ll finished my M.S next year, the dream we once had. I delicate all my achievements to you. Thank you for being in my life for the 6 years you were. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. For pushing me. It's true what they say… the good die young. For what? Nobody will ever know the answer to that. Your last text were “ I’ll be the the star, the ones that brighter than the rest”. That day forever changed my life. I did not know that was going to be the last time I would talk to you. I wish I could've stopped this from happening. I keep going through everything in my head trying to think of ways I could've prevented this from happening, but I know I couldn't have. I wish I had the superpower to turn back time. I may carry guilt for the reason you aren’t here. You were, and still are, so loved by many. Sethika, Even though you are not here anymore, you will always be in my heart. You were such a special person. I wish you could see all the things i saw in you. You’ll be forever young and beautiful; P.S I don’t end this story with a period, but a semicolon instead, in hopes that one day we may reunite and our adventures together can start again. In another life, I would be your sister and I’ll be the older ones;